Squirming in my Chair

Sometimes it can be very difficult to sit in a prayer room for 6 hours. Today we are here for 9 hours; I nearly had a freak-out moment. I almost started crying knowing I couldn’t leave until the next morning, except for one break. I was not made to sit for this long; to be quiet for this long. So much of the routine and schedule of IHOP is contrary to how I love to be. Most days are spent in the 3 same rooms, little variation in routine, next to no free time. This week is pretty intense. It’s a total of 67 hours. I have so much energy but I have to sit and I can’t talk. I am squirming so much in these chairs.
I was made for adventure. This energy I have is from the Lord and unless I make it to the gym to expend some of it I get extremely antsy. I went today but I could have really stayed for much longer. It barely gets my energy out to be at a place where I don’t completely flip.
The longer I am at IHOP the more I desire to go to India. It’s probably on my thoughts at least every 10 minutes. Every teaching I hear, every experience in the prayer room. Prayer is powerful and wonderful. I have clung to it for so many years, but I know it is not my call to be a full-time prayer-missionary. God chose one tribe out of 12 to serve in ministry unto the Lord. The others were not built that way. The Levites’ responsibility is to minister to Him—not to others. They have dedicated their lives to serve God’s heart in worship and prayer.
I am learning so much about who I am by being in a place that is not my place. Yet, at the same time I really enjoy it here. I am learning how to have prayer as the base for all that I do. Also, it is bliss to have a community that has the goal of seeking out the Lord’s heart in prayer. Whether I was made to pray or to go, we are all made to love. Love is made complete when we all work together.

1 Peter 5:2-4
2Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; 3not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock. 4And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away.